Deborah interviewed 7/27 5:45pm on Artists & Ascension

Tune in to this discussion on Tues evening 7/27 at this link when Nancy Wait from her “Artists and Ascension” Blogtalk radio show will interview Deborah:

Artists Ascension | Internet Radio | Blog Talk Radio

Singing My Way to My Stolen Car; A Prospective Dream

Over many years I have had and heard of numerous dreams about cars, taking place in cars, around cars and parking lots, cars with flat  tires, cars going too fast or backwards, flying cars, wrecked cars, and on and on. Because so much of contemporary life depends on cars as the major means of transportations, it isn’t surprising that we frequently dream of them. In some cases they can even stand for the condition of the body, but often they allude to our movement, our modus operandi or particularly established method of getting around in life. We often ask “how’s it going?” In other words, our lives are often about movement, we move towards our goals, or we get stuck and encounter obstacles. Perhaps you’ve had such a dream.

The other night I dreamt my car was stolen. Because the dream is populated with several different friends of mine from different walks of life, all together at a social event, I’ll quote my whole recording of the dream:

Someone has stolen my car. My blue Toyota was parked at my friend Janet’s house where there is a party. The house looks like the home I lived years ago. Everyone is looking for my car. Amanda comes over with her boyfriend and both of Janet’s men, Ron and Dan are there (Dan is actually her husband who, in reality, has passed over). I have to get to a teaching job at the art school and I’m thinking I’ll have to take a bus. Someone finds a set of keys but they belong to Amanda. Another friend, Carlie, is with a girl who has a beautiful voice, she is singing. They want me to sing with them but I don’t want to since I’m preoccupied with finding my car. I’m thinking I’ll just have to report the car gone and deal with it.

On the surface the dream is saying that I have no current means of transportation and it will take me considerably longer to get to the next place I want to go. But as I thought about the dream I see it was presenting me with some encouragement and an idea. Dreams that suggest which way one might go in the future are called “prospective” or future-oriented. In this case the particular car is a blue Toyota I had about fifteen years ago, so I would ask myself how I am moving in my life that might resemble the way I was moving at that time in my life. In fact I was quite over-burdened with work in the years I owned that car. I was teaching an overload of courses at several colleges trying to make ends meet. Currently, I have invested time in independent teach and to some extent still scrambling. I am occasionally feeling burdened because I am in charge of my elderly mother’s dementia care. I don’t feel I can move around as easily because I am living with my mother and to go away means I need to pay extra for her help as she can’t be alone. (My mother is a special case because she tries to walk and can’t remember she can’t walk and she would be constantly at risk in a nursing home where a “seat-belt” or restraint is outlawed.)

The dream also takes place in a house I no longer live in, and it is one I lived in for a period when I felt somewhat “trapped.” It’s true that many good times took place in that home yet it also symbolized a time-span when I was inhibited and did not feel free to fully express myself as a writer. So the dream resonates with the theme of being unable to go where I want to go.

Yet dreams are always paradoxical and this one proves to be so in that the house belongs to my friend Janet and her two men. In actuality one of those men has passed on.  Perhaps they are both there because there is no partner in my life right now and I would like to have one. You could say I have done some time in Deadman Land, as I haven’t been pursuing another relationship. But I certainly would like to find a man like Janet’s current man who is a wonderful person and extremely devoted to her. And by virtue of Janet being in the dream—(she is successful and fulfilled in my opinon)—the dream says I have Janet’s potential.

Admittedly, I also see similarities between my “dead” man and Janet’s passed-on husband in that they were both artistic,charismatic and boyish. Another polarity the dream raises is the car that could help me travel and the car that I have been robbed of. And the question comes up: who has actually stolen the car? That unnamed person is also an aspect of me and it could refer not to a human person but to a fear or a negative habit I may have. For example, the dread of middle-aged dating, or a propensity for perfectionism, hence self-criticism. Surely no one else is responsible for the stolen car but me!

Interestingly someone at the party who is helping to look for my car has found Amanda’s keys. I must think now about the Amanda aspects of myself and I come up with the most recent fact I know about Amanda which is that she is in a new relationship. Wouldn’t I like to have Amanda’s keys! Yes, but the wish is still quite unconscious, as I am not doing much to meet a new partner.

So the dream appears to be about my suppressed relationship-loneliness or longing, and how I am not only not moving in that direction, but I don’t even have the means of moving toward that kind of fulfillment. The dreams seems to be saying I’ve car-jacked my own relationship possibilities. And why? Well, again the feeling of the too-busy-burden comes up. The truth is I do go out though I am not actively social. I go to spiritual and networking events where I can improve myself and/or my online services, but perhaps because I am still not feeling “rooted” in my living situation, I don’t reach out as much as I could. And of course, time is shrinking; there never seems to be enough!

In the dream I am going to teach at the Art school. I used to teach at Massachusetts College of Art but because dreams are seldom about their surface meanings, I think this suggestion has more to do with my teaching spirituality in poetry. I have designed a course on spiritual poets including Rumi, Hafiz and Tagore, older masters of the tradition as well as some contemporary poets but I have as yet not taught it.

The dream appears to encourage me to find students for this course and perhaps I really should be doing more to “move” in that direction. The dream leads me to the idea of an online webinar or teleclass I could possibly organize. It states since I don’t have a car to get there, or an institution to teach for, I am going to use more time and a slower traveling means if I have to get there by bus (indpendent teaching). Maybe I should “get a wiggle on” as my mother used to say . . .

I find the end of the dream to be provocative in that I am asked to “sing” with my friend and her friend who has a beautiful voice. What projections have I put onto them? (I’m always thrilled when a positive shadow figure shows up in a dream, telling me I have more potential in my unconscious that I could put to use.) Well, indeed, Carlie is in a steady relationship and has some newfound joy in her life. It’s also true that in what we call the “real” world, Carlie sings in a choral society. When I ask myself what it means to sing, I think of joy, and a choir and choral singing seem specifically sacred to me. I also think my way of “singing” is teaching and writing poetry.

And yes, I consider myself on a spiritual journey at this phase of my life. The question the dream raises is: can I sing myself into finding my car? Will the singing be the means to move me forward into relationship and more fulfillment? A quote comes to mind by the renowned spiritual poet Rabindranath Tagore: “God respects me when I work, but he loves me when I sing.” The dream suggests there is more singing potential and I should put it into practice. 

Deborah on Blog Talk Radio Sat 7/24 1pm EST

Tune in to Kathi Hamilton’s show Saturday at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/simikathy

where we’ll be talking about my memoir, Dreams and Dream Image Work.

The Future That Brought Her Here Hits #1!

on Amazon in Social Science & Psychology September 16, 2009

The Graduating Homeless; Compensatory Dreams

Sometimes a dream may appear negative when you first       express what you’ve  experienced such as I am in a    gymnasium with homeless people . . . exactly the  words    I spoke into my recorder the other morning. But as I  continued to listen to the recording I was able to accept  the dream as encouraging rather than telling  me yet again my raging issue is my finances. Well, “consciously” I suppose it is, but  was the unconscious kindly compensating for this unbalanced opinion?

In this dream I was giving out blankets to people as we co-operated with each other   to make room for everyone to sleep in the gym comfortably. I recorded We are all      smiling and helping one another. Everyone appears to  have a job and everyone is working together to be of  assistance to anyone who needs something. I could see  myself greeting and checking in with people as I walked

around.

Then a scene change and a new element entered the dream. I am talking to the people in charge. We are preparing for graduation. It will be a great party. I have a really pretty skirt to wear later. Maybe this was an emergency shelter after a hurricane and not home to the homeless?  No matter. There would be a graduation!  A reason to celebrate, to move on to a new phase of life. Never mind that it’s been a hundred years since my last graduation . . .  Clothing in a dream often has to do with persona and attitude, how one presents oneself. New clothes can show social or economic development. My son is here. He’s smiling too .  . . it may be a rehearsal. Already, people are festive; I hear music.

So, okay, I thought later. Yes, there’s The Bigtop Tarp and I’m in a crowd of people wearing long, raggedy raincoats but we’re all happy waiting for the Big Show. Even my ego state in the dream is happy. True, it’s quite possible to look at a dream and see how the ego has misread the situation. (Dude, you’re in a gym with homeless people!) But the prevalent feeling is joyful, excited, anticipatory; this is the feeling I awoke with. And had there been nothing else in the dream, the sorry state of things would be something to consider.

The little (or not so little) addition of my son’s appearance was another validation for me that the dream was auspicious. In “real” life, my son in his own words said to me not too long ago that he is having the best year of his life. Happily married, but he is also passionate about a new direction in his financial life. Whenever I see him in a dream, which is fairly frequent, I need to remind myself my dream-son represents an aspect of myself. Our children usually stand as symbols for our plans, ideas and projects, so in this case, his presence bodes well. I have several writing projects in the works.

It’s always important to note the ego’s point of view and in the inter-active dream process of image work, I would make certain this dreamer described and felt the sense of “homelessness” completely before moving to the ego alternates, or ego-alien, my son being one of these, the crowd of homeless representing a huge energy as well. But they’re happy homeless. And those people in charge, also alien to my ego– they know that we’re graduating. All of these viewpoints stand for the many subjectivities in my psyche.  

The unconscious offers up gifts, or sometimes . . .  just  compensates for excessive conscious worries and tries to  bring balance. And dreams do exaggerate. Still, I’m  gratefulfor the  twists in this dream and I look forward to  exchanging my gymnasium blanket for a mortar-board!